i gotta decide on what i wanna do and stick to it. i don't know if it's good or bad that i keep changing my mind so often and adjusting to the circumstances.

on one hand it's good because then, i would really tailor to the circumstances? on the other hand it's really tiring because i have to keep thinking of what i should do with regards to this... and then the next day i have to think again, what i should do with regards to that.

hmm. i think i am really not living up to the "restful life". i should just live everything to God and not worry and think so much right?

for which man, by worrying, could add one more day to his life?

it's just so hard to let go. and let go of your thoughts even. i find it hard to go back to the place of faith i was two years back. because when my prayer didn't materialise i really hit rock-bottom.

but i'll try. cos' i know He has my future in His hands. and the plans He has for me are to prosper me and give me a good future.

it's just... everything seems like it's hit a wall. i feel like time is crawling. and i am not moving. gotta ignore my circumstances and walk by faith ya?

for now, i'll just be still and wait. and contently be your best friend. and we'll see what God does.