Did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?


These few days have been hard for me, to say the least.

I feel like there's this gaping hole in my heart all the time The times when I think of them I feel like little poisoned arrows are digging into me I feel lost I feel resigned I can't sleep at night I dread turning off the lights and lying on my bed because that's when I can't escape my own thoughts At least in the day I can keep myself busy Sometimes I dream of him Sometimes I wake up feeling so scared for no reason Sometimes tears well in my eyes And among it all I think I just feel this great sense of loss I had him for a while But he doesn't smile for me anymore And I don't know when the winds changed When along the way did I lose him I'm just so broken So tired I feel like my heart's bleeding and I can't stop it no matter how hard I try


2009 is gonna be a good year. I felt it the moment the clock striked twelve. The air even became fresher (okay, that may be because it rained the past few days... but still!).

The first day of January, I got an email saying I had been accepted to be a Teaching Assistant to my prof.

The second day of January, I got into skating exco! (Walkover, no speech required - phew!)

The third day... I guess I can't have pleasant surprises every single day. But, I'm still feeling incredibly happy. For no reason.

Even though I know it's gonna be a busy year for me (6 modules, 1 TA, skating exco, OCIP overall i/c), I'm walking the first few steps of it with confidence. I feel extremely blessed and thankful, and I know that prayers will continue to be answered and He will continue to watch over and guide every step of my way.