Hello Stranger.

"Hey, have a safe trip."
"I will, thank you."


Here I am in the school library, with nothing to do and about two hours more to rot before I head to Peninsular Plaza to browse for new skates with the Smux people. Well, technically, I do having a learning journal to submit but I'm feeling too lazy to do it right now. Argh. I'm bored too. Haha kill me.

Recently I've been getting these bouts of what Amanda calls "the Yun Syndrome", because there's no other word to explain it and neither of us have ever met someone who feels these feelings too. Although it's not new to me, it has never affected me as intensely nor frequently as it has been doing the past few days. Everyday, in fact. Sigh. I don't even know how to describe it but it's definitely not imagined, because it's a very consistent feeling. More consistent than happiness, but I can't say the same for sadness, because sadness must be the most consistent feeling ever. Or maybe that would be jealousy. Or anger. Hmm. Anyway, "the Yun Syndrome" is something like a mix between homesickness, and a kind of hollowness. But it definitely can't be homesickness because sometimes I get it when I'm at home. And you can actually feel it physically, like something feels different with your heart, literally tugging at your heartstrings. It's not a nice feeling, because it makes you feel lost, and you really feel as if something's missing in your life, but you don't know what. All I can do is sit and wait for it to pass.


I'm so tired of him bugging me even though it's long over. It makes me feel as if getting into that relationship was the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. URGH.

I'm kinda nervous about the upcoming weeks. Like I know that it's gonna get real busy from now on but I feel uneasy without at least some sort of to-do list to prepare me for what's coming. I think I have a tendency to get paranoid whenever I start losing control. I just don't want to get swept away when it all comes.


Zouk, Oct 10.




So much for intending to start a "sleep early, wake up early" habit by the end of term break.


This week has been crazy busy. Even though it's supposed to be term break. The Community-Service Project is taking up almost all of my time. I'm actually quite scared of the kids after visiting the home last Monday. They may be small, but man, they're a fierce lot.

I didn't get to go for the Datuk trek because the vacancies were full, but according to Guen, it wasn't all that great. She got bitten by a leech at the ankle, and apparently some guy had at leech biting at his ahem. Way gross (and funny). I hope I never encounter any leeches in my future treks. So anyway, instead of being with the Smux Trek team on Monday, I was at the ice-skating rink with Smux Skating. It was fun! Learnt new moves. Hope I'm able to master more moves at the blading clinic tomorrow.

Diana and I applied to go to New Jersey next summer, instead of Florida. It was kind of an impulsive decision and now I actually wished I'd put Florida as first choice. Oh well. I guess it's good either way, as long as I get to go to USA :D